


Sight of the Sun

by midoriverte



Series: Hidekane Week 2018 [5]
Category: Tokyo Ghoul
Genre: Day 7: promises, Hidekane Week, Hidekane Week 2018, M/M, fluffier than it sounds
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-07-29
Updated: 2018-07-29
Packaged: 2019-06-13 06:33:36
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,025
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15358374
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/midoriverte/pseuds/midoriverte
Summary: Kaneki hates making promises. It's far easier to never promise anyone anything than to face them when he inevitably fails to keep it.But he owes Hide more than anyone else.





	Sight of the Sun

Kaneki was afraid of making promises. He was afraid of their permanence. A moment’s weakness could bind you to a decision forever. He was afraid of making promises he could not keep. Even if he had the best intentions, he knew probably better than anyone that intentions meant nothing. He was terrified of letting people down, of seeing the disappointment in their eyes, of them hating him. 

 

So he tried not to promise anything to anyone. Though that meant no one could ever expect anything of him, that they didn’t entrust him with anything. And although he knew it was his own fault, he sometimes wished they would. 

 

The last time he promised someone anything, it was to Hide. He hadn’t meant to. But Hide never asked him for anything, and yet he owed him so much. Maybe he was caught off guard, maybe he was scared to see Hide so uncharacteristically desperate. But he made a promise to Hide without a second thought that day. 

 

It had been soon after they reunited. After the war between the CCG and ghouls had somewhat ended and Tokyo was getting back on its feet. 

 

It was after Hide had kissed him. He had seemed resigned at the time. Like he had expected Kaneki to turn him down, like it was his final confession before he attempted to move on with his life. 

 

And that had been likely what Hide had intended, when he had kissed Kaneki with determination that day. Kaneki couldn’t blame him. 

 

But Kaneki had realized something in their time apart. He loved him. It was so simple. He couldn’t believe he himself had once called Hide his very heart, and yet still hadn’t even realized his own feelings. 

 

Until he had thought Hide was dead. That he had killed him. And he had to live without his heart. 

 

He had been given a second chance that he never deserved. He couldn’t ruin this. He would never get another chance like this. 

 

But Hide did not accept Kaneki’s feelings immediately, despite the fact that he had been the one who had kissed him first. 

 

“You need to promise me,” Hide said, with such ferocity that Kaneki felt his heart rate quicken. He had never seen him like this. “That you will  _ never  _ leave me like you did, never again.”

 

“Hide-”

 

“Promise me!” Hide said, and tears sparkled in his eyes. “You… you have no idea how it felt. To be left behind. To desperately try to figure out if you were dead or alive, trying to figure out how to get back to you.”

 

“I-”

 

“All because you ‘wanted to protect me’-”

 

“I did-”

 

“But you were really just scared to face me, weren’t you?”

 

Kaneki said nothing, which was answer enough. 

 

“I don’t care if it really does put me in danger,” Hide said. “I never want to be left behind like that again. If you want to be with me- promise me that.”

 

Hide didn’t stop the tears from falling. 

 

Kaneki loved him. 

 

“I won’t,” he said. “I promise. I won’t leave you again.”

 

Although their days were mostly peaceful now, there was always a nagging fear at the back of Kaneki’s mind that he might have to break that promise. 

 

But if the thought of leaving, of breaking his promise to Hide ever came to him, he remembered Hide’s fierce, tearful look, and he knew he would never be able to break his heart like that. 

 

Now, he waited nervously for Hide in the park where they had spent so many nights as children and teenagers who didn’t want to go home. Who already had a home as long as they were together. 

 

He heard Hide scrambling up the side of the whale. He had heard him coming for a while, but wanted to give him the chance to surprise him. 

 

“Don’t you think we’re getting a bit old for this?” Hide said, putting his arms around Kaneki’s waist in a hug and resting his chin on Kaneki’s shoulder for a moment before settling in beside him. 

 

Hide was wearing a medical mask as usual, it still made Kaneki feel guilty, but at least Hide was starting to heal. 

 

“It’s important to me!” Kaneki protested.

 

“Me too.” God, Kaneki loved how Hide could smile with just his eyes. 

 

Kaneki leaned forward to kiss him on the forehead. 

 

“So, what’s the occasion?” Hide asked. 

 

“I… have something to ask you,” Kaneki said hesitantly. “But- would you be okay with taking off your mask first? I want to see your face.”

 

Hide raised his eyebrows, but complied with Kaneki’s request. 

 

Kaneki’s stomach twisted when he saw the scars, but he knew Hide would not want him to feel that way. 

 

“What did you want to ask me?” Hide prompted gently. 

 

Kaneki took a deep breath, steadying himself. He could do this. 

 

“I- I don’t want to beat around the bush,” Kaneki said. “I love you a lot, more than anything in my life, and I want to spend the rest of my life with you.”

 

He fished in his pocket to pull out the small box. He looked into Hide’s astonished face as he opened it and showed the small ring inside. 

 

“Kaneki-”

 

“I know we can’t… get married yet,” Kaneki said. “But I want to give you a symbol of commitment. I really want to be with you forever, if you’ll have me.”

 

“So… a promise ring?” Hide’s voice was choked with emotion. He was tearing up. 

 

“Yeah,” Kaneki said, swallowing nervously. 

 

“Of course I will.” Tears streamed down Hide’s face. So different from the last time he had seen Hide cry. This time they were tears of joy. 

 

Kaneki took the ring out of the box with shaking hands and placed it on Hide’s finger. 

 

Hide stared at his hand in wonder and said “I love you. So, so much.”

 

“I love you too.” The joy radiating of Hide’s face was contagious. His smile was lopsided and scarred, and it was perfect, it was beautiful. Kaneki leaned forward to kiss him. 

 

And he knew this was one promise he would never break. 


End file.
